TV
by JJ Dragon
Summary: Matt, Mello and Near wished they could go into the tv and be part of tthe programmes... They got more than they wanted. Can our favourite trio get out of this living hell? T for language, randomness and stealing Gene Hunt's Quattro!


**Before it all started…**

Matt, Mello and Near were sat on the sofa watching TV. Well, they would be watching TV, if Matt would stop flicking through the channels.

"MATT!" Mello yelled at the gamer "HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT'S ON IF YOU KEEP CHANGING IT BEFORE WE CAN READ?!"

"Sorry Mello." Matt said "Sky has a lot of channels and I want to get through them all quickly."

Mello still wasn't impressed.

"Wouldn't it be cool if we got sucked into the television and became part of the programme?" Near asked suddenly.

"Yeah!" Mello smiled "We could annoy the hell out of the viewers and characters!"

"I wish it would happen…" The trio said at the same time. Suddenly, there was a flash of light and they fell unconscious.

**Channel 1**

Near awoke and found himself lying down on a hard, tiled floor. There were people around him, staring.

"What do you we should do with them, Gov?" A man asked.

"I reckon we should stick them in the cells." Another man suggested.

"We have to ask them questions, first." A woman said. Once Near's eyes had adjusted, he recognised who these people were. Somehow, they'd ended up in the new series of Ashes To Ashes!

The trio were sat in a large room, probably for interviewing. After recovering from their shock and excitement, DCI Gene Hunt and DI Alex Drake wanted to ask them questions. This only made the trio even more excited.

"Why were you in the office and how did you get in there?" Alex asked.

"Oh my god!" Matt whispered to Mello "We're being interviewed by the awesome Alex Drake and Gene Hunt!"

"Allow me to explain," Near said "We have…err…been asked to join your police force…"

"Really? Because we've had no notice about it." Alex cut in.

"Yes…Well…It's a surprise. I have identification." Near handed Alex his SPK identity card.

"Near… That's an… _unusual _name." Alex noted. Near just smiled.

"Then, who are you two?" Gene asked, coldly.

"My name's Mello and this is Matt." Mello said, slyly.

"We have been sent by the SPK to work with you on your current case." Near said.

"Everybody, I'd like to introduce you to our new members." Alex said to the police force. Everyone gave the trio weird looks.

"Why do we never get women recruits?" Ray asked Chris.

"I don't know. These three look really weird." Chris replied.

"DI Drake," Near said to Alex "Before we get fully introduced, I'd like to speak to my colleagues." Near turned to Matt and Mello.

"Look." He whispered "Just pretend we have no idea who they are, ok. We're going to have to fit into this TV programme." Matt and Mello nodded and they turned back to the others.

"My name is Near. That is what you must call me and nothing else." Near said. Matt was bored, so he lit a cigarette.

"My name is Mello." Mello smirked. He was enjoying confusing the characters.

"Hey. I'm Matt." Matt said. The group muttered.

"Near, Mello and Matt have come from the SPK to join us and help us with the current case." Alex said.

"What's an SPK?" Shaz asked. Allex turned to Near. Near had to think fast. He couldn't tell them what it really was. They wouldn't know who or what Kira was.

"Um… Society for Police Crew." Near said. The group laughed.

"Crew is spelt with a C." Chris laughed.

"Yeah, well the creators were dyslexic." Matt said.

"Was the creator the guy in the leather?" Ray joked. Everyone laughed. Mello was about to go and shoot Ray, but Near held him back.

"Enough joking." Alex ordered. "Our main link is the Crescent Moon dating agency."

"Crap!" Matt muttered. "I haven't got my car!"

After days of settling in and finding evidence, Near, Mello and Matt were finally considered part of the team. Matt was good friends with Ray and Chris. Mello was good friends with Shaz, but Chris wasn't impressed. Near… well… he got on well with all of them. The trio realised that they couldn't change outfits and couldn't do anything out of the range of the programme, like invent a DS. Matt wasn't too happy. Well, where were we? Oh yes. One afternoon, DCI Gene Hunt stomped out of his office.

"All right!" He shouted "Which one of you git faces stole my Quattro keys?!"

Meanwhile…

"WHOO! This is much better than MY car!" Matt said. The Quattro was like car heaven for him!

Matt strode into the office.

"where have you been?" Ray asked "Out chatting up a pretty lady?"

"If you can call a car a lady." Matt joked. Ray and Chris laughed. Gene was not amused.

"If there is just one scratch on my car, you're dead." He hissed.

"Don't worry, Gov." Matt reassured "She was in good hands." Mello wolf whistled.

"Shut up, Mello!" Matt laughed. Gene barged past the gamer and out through the door.


End file.
